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weemsfreak · 6 months ago

Text

The Only One

Hi ya'll, happy pride month!!

Sorry for being mia, I have been quite busy with school and also working on this (slowly) all of June. I was unsure of the vibes I wanted this story to give, as I have been feeling confused(?) as of late, and for some reason June has brought many feelings and a couple crap experiences that I wanted to incorporate into here. I did make the story hopeful toward the end, but I just wanted to say that if anyone feels this way, you are not alone!

Calling our Lesbian Headmistress to help make the confusing and lonely times a bit better with a pride event. I know not everybody likes to celebrate pride in this way, but I thought it was cute.

Larissa Weems x studentreader (platonic) ~4.6k words

Part of my 'All the Time' series, based on reader being a lesbian but struggles with her sexuality and falls for her straight friend (canon experience ;))

Warnings: partially closeted, mention of family not understanding, self reflection (internalized homophobia/being proud)

༻��

Nobody ever talks about how lonely it is, being queer in a small town.

The lack of representation, of places to go, and people to meet. The sliver of hope that you will feel safe if you decide to venture, if you decide to try.

Her with him and him with her and 'girl crush' this and 'man crush' that.

But all in all, you thought that perhaps the worst of it all was the feeling of being the only one.

You listen to songs that describe other places, places you wish your mother would tell you to go.

You know she wants you to stay, but you can't ignore the crazy visions of you in…well, somewhere that perhaps doesn't exist- or maybe it does.

Somewhere a different version of yourself could live; hopeful, happy, proud.

Your favorite movie, which makes you feel accepted, alive, is less than ten years old, even though you're a fan of old classic Hollywood.

You don't see yourself in them.

Many times before, you've heard people say 'it would be so much easier to be gay.'

They must've been joking, of course; but being gay was not a joke.

They joke about being gay but they've never wondered if their family would still love them.

They joke about being gay but they've never been scared of their friends abandoning them and talking behind their back.

They joke about being gay but they've never rejected a man with the reason of being interested in women, just for the man to ask if it's the truth, 'they could turn you', so they say.

They joke about being gay but they've never been the quiet one when others talked about boys.

They joke about being gay but they've never felt like they were disrespecting women because they found them attractive.

They joke about being gay but they've never been the outcast.

They joke about being gay but they've never worried about their loved ones not attending their wedding.

They joke about being gay but they've never pretended to like men to try and fit in with their peers.

They joke about being gay but they've never had nobody to talk to.

They joke about being gay but they've never had nobody to cry to.

They joke about being gay but they've never wished they were a boy, for the sole reason of a woman liking them back.

They joke about being gay but they've never had to love somebody in secret.

They joke about being gay but they'll never know what it feels like.

As bad as you felt, through the loneliness, the grief, the 'what ifs' and the doubt, it wasn't the fact of being queer that scared you, it wasn't that you weren't open, or accepting.

What did hurt though, was what came with it.

The fear of never finding someone, the fear of being rejected and harmed in public, the fear of never understanding how you really felt; the fear of feeling too deeply.

There have been times where you almost, almost, decided to leave it be.

'In another life' you said, shrugging your shoulders as a tear dripped down your cheek at the thought of faking it, and marrying a man.

But one day, you were reading a book dated from the 60s, when the realization hit you.

Years ago, regrettably not that many, you would not have the choice, you would not have the freedom.

And here you were, in the age of progression, hiding away in the land of heterosexuals.

You had a choice, you had freedom.

For the woman before you who were stuck in sham marriages, cried themselves to sleep, snuck around with another woman and feared for their life, for the women who raised children but not with whom they loved, for the women who had no such thing as freedom of choice.

You would not fake it, you would not hide, you would be your true self for them, and for you, regardless of the very possible fact that you could be the only queer in this small town.

༻༺

The headmistress stood outside of the chemistry classroom one gloomy morning, greeting students as they entered as your teacher always did.

You sauntered through the halls as you watched your peers and their modernistic and typical ways.

You weren't sure who's twisted idea it was, to put hundreds of adolescents in underfunded schools run by people whose dreams were crushed years ago…but you admired the sadism.

Opening your locker and retrieving your books, your sketchbook met the floor with an echo when a guy accidentally bumped into you.

"Oh crap, sorry Y/N"

You gave him a menacing look, before taking a breath and straightening yourself out.

"No worries."

His friend, who had shoved him into you, continued on to class as he spoke from down the hall. "C'mon man, leave the freak alone."

You expected him to continue on as well, but he didn't.

"How are things going?"

You'd likely be late for class if he kept the conversation up.

"A lot of this" you shrugged, pointing to your books.

"Yea, me too. The harvest festival is coming up though, I know you love the fall, and all things creepy."

You huffed in amusement, nodding your head.

"It’s nice to have things to look forward to."

He smiled and nodded, looking to his feet.

"Well, I'll see you there. Maybe I'll message you?"

You shook your head uninterested, not holding him to it.

"Sure."

Bending down to pick your sketchbook up off the floor, it was open to a doodle you had done which was rather, well, not appropriate for school.

Slamming your sketchbook shut, you stood and met your locker mirror; your own reflection, as well as the principals, smiling back at you.

Jump scare.

"Good morning, darling."

You spun around in surprise, staring wide eyed.

"Principal Weems, good morning."

She nodded as she looked at you in amusement, hoping to hide her true thoughts about your morning interactions.

"Where is Ms. Currie?"

The principal tilted her head at you, "Out today. I was notified last minute, so I'm your substitute."

Well, it was your lucky day.

The principal never failed to notice your…disinterest.

She didn't fail to notice the way some students picked on you, nor your lack of emotion; your presence of indifference towards men.

She saw herself in you, you were just like her.

That thought brought her both joy and pain.

༻༺

Sitting in the quad, you nervously twisted your fingers as you watched your friend approach.

You had heard, apparently, that it was a 'cannon lesbian experience' to have a crush on your friend.

Man were they right, and man, did it hurt.

She sat with a smile, though you could see that her attention was diverted.

"Hi."

"Hey Mar."

You swallowed, looking her in the eye across the table.

"I um, I was thinking, the Rave 'N is soon, maybe we could go together…"

Just then, you watched Gannon make his way to the table and sit beside your friend.

She squealed lightly, pulling him closer to her.

"Y/N, did I tell you Gannon and I are going to the Rave 'N together?!"

Your heart dropped, but it wasn't anything new, it wasn't at all surprising.

For you knew your friend liked men, but you had thought that maybe, well, you didn’t know; maybe there was hope that someone could be like you.

"Oh, uh, congratulations."

Your heart panged as they looked into each others eyes, smiling in anticipation.

"So, what were you talking about?"

You shook your head and let out a weak chuckle, quickly thinking of an excuse.

"I um, I was thinking maybe we could get ready for the Rave'N together, that could be fun."

Marcella smiled as she stood, linking her arm with Gannon's.

"Sure! I'll see you later!"

The principal, who supervised lunch in the quad, watched your rejection with disappointment and regret.

It dug deep, it brought back memories of her own time at Nevermore; the hate and the heartbreak that she felt, that you felt.

Sometimes, things never changed.

'I don't know if I believe the way I feel is real

And I often wonder if it is

Watching your friend dance with a guy

And pondering whether it's what she truly wishes

Should you step in, or leave her be?

You know you wouldn’t wish it, but does she?

It hurts a bit, a little, a lot; watching her dance so close to him

And maybe she'd dance with you like that too

But not in this life, no, not now,

For she's dancing with him, and you watch from the crowd'

༻༺

You knew it wasn’t the fault of your own; the despair, the regret, the loneliness.

But, you couldn't help but feel it when you were alone, so utterly alone, regardless of the fact that you could be surrounded by people.

They'd never understand the feeling of being so outcast, ironically, the feeling of being so different. The feeling of being told that how you felt was somehow wrong.

You felt it, you felt it wholeheartedly; and how could your heart be wrong?

Your parents, who never meant any harm, contradicted themselves.

Honestly, you couldn't exactly say how, but it hurt in a way that you didn't understand.

You thought maybe they were smarter, more knowledgeable, perhaps wiser than you.

They had always said that you could talk to them, but it was useless, as any attempt made you feel worse, not better.

They had been on this earth for sometime, however, surely they must've experienced the hate, and transformed themselves to some degree?

Wishful thinking.

They could never be so open.

And you think, maybe that's what hurt the most; wishing they could understand, wishing they would care enough to understand.

Alas, wishing was useless.

There were nights where you prayed for an older, wiser being to cry to. Someone who could tell you what to do and how to feel, someone who would listen, someone who would care.

Someone who would see you. Someone who understood, because they felt it themself.

༻༺

You made every attempt to be true to yourself.

To not lie, to let yourself feel what you felt, to get out more; to live.

It was hard to be true to yourself, though, when your friends agreed to accompany you to a pride day in Jericho, and then ditched you.

You resented them, you envied them, they didn't know what it felt like; they never would.

The hurt multiplied ten fold when June came around. The hiding, the thinking, the loneliness, it didn't settle, it didn't stop.

After an hour of scrubbing off your makeup, crying face down into your bed, and ditching your themed outfit, you arrived in Jericho, the opening ceremony finished.

The town square was very festive, multiple restaurants and shops agreed to host a scavenger hunt, crafted special meals to celebrate, provide smaller fun activities, and fireworks. You were proud of the small town of Jericho, they were trying; as were you.

And although they were trying, these activities were not really fun to do, well…alone.

Alas, that's what you were. Alone.

Passing by the Weathervane, you saw a small group of Nevermore students on their way out. You wanted to join in, but you didn’t know them, not that well.

Peering over at the counter, you found a drink special for the day;

'buy any regular sized drink, get rainbow whipped cream for free.'

You snorted, it was rather cheesy, but cute.

Stepping up to the counter, you ordered an iced coffee.

"Would you like rainbow whipped cream on that?"

You sighed, about to shake your head no when you heard a voice at the other end of the counter.

"Thank you, dear. This looks delicious."

She was standing tall with a red lipped smile, peering down at her hot chocolate; rainbow whipped cream on top.

You had to agree, it did look delicious.

"Yes, uh, whipped cream please."

As soon as your drink was made, you beelined it for the door, hoping she wouldn't see you.

It wasn't that you didn’t want to see her, it wasn't that you didn’t want to talk.

It was that you didn’t want her to see you- alone.

Unsure of where to go next, you stood on the sidewalk and tried your drink; delicious.

The doorbell rang and she stepped out, gazing around the streets.

In a flash, you turned and headed down the sidewalk, away from the activities, away from her.

"Y/N?"

You stopped, slowly turning as if you were unsure of where the voice had come from.

A wave, a smile, and she was next to you in a few strides.

"Darling, you're going the wrong way, the festival is this way!"

She never failed to make you happy, her and her rainbow hot chocolate.

You shrugged, "I uh, I don't really want to participate."

Her head tiled in question as she caught sight of your drink.

"You're not interested in celebrating pride?"

Well, that just made you sound homophobic. You shook your head quickly.

"No, no I am. I just, my friends were supposed to come with me but, they changed their minds I guess."

The principal looked down at you, your head hung in sadness, perhaps shame.

Today was not a day to be sad, it was not a day to be shameful, it was a day to be proud, to celebrate.

"Well, I am here with a few Nevermore students. I am proud to support them, no matter who or what they are."

You couldn't help but smile crookedly in awe, meeting her appreciative blue gaze. She bent down closer to you, softening her voice. "That includes you, love."

Your heart beat fast as you stared in surprise, tears threatened to spill as you felt accepted and cared for, for the first time in a long time.

Taking a sip of your drink with a shaky hand, you fiddled with your jewellery.

The woman saw you thinking, contemplating.

She felt the exact same at your age. Knowing who you were, to an extent, but pushing the feeling away with every chance you got.

You didn’t want to, she knew, you wanted to be proud, she knew, but it was hard when you felt like the only one, the only one in this small town.

"How about we try the scavenger hunt, hmm?"

You looked up at her with a frown, but inside you felt joyful.

"We're probably already behind" you chuckled.

The woman waved a hand in dismissal, "Nonsense. We have a good chance if we work together."

༻༺

You made your way back into the Weathervane, retrieving the first clue to the hunt.

'If the first pride flag was designed in Jericho, it would've been designed here.'

You passed the first clue to her, knowing the first pride flag was designed in 1978. If it had have been designed in Jericho, well, you had three options.

The woman smiled, gasping lightly as she recalled "'Sew it forward', it was established here in the 1960s."

༻༺

You followed the intriguing woman to 'Sew it forward', watching as she retrieved the second clue and stamped the pride book red.

She took the clue between her fingers, narrowing her eyes at the small writing.

'This famous bar in New York City was the site of the 1969 riots, a pivotal event in LGBTQ+ history. Find the Jericho bar that starts with the same letter.'

You racked your brain around the bars in Jericho. You have never been to the bars besides for lunch.

"Stones!"

The principal raised a brow at you, a small smirk on her face.

"What?! Just because I'm not of age doesn’t mean I haven't been. Stones has good pizza."

A loud laugh was heard throughout the fabric shop. You were overjoyed that you could make her laugh freely, albeit most likely sounding stupid.

She headed for the door; and you would follow her anywhere.

༻༺

Arriving at Stones, you found those also attempting the hunt, and those drowning in drinks.

You stamped the book with the second stamp, orange, and retrieved the third clue.

'Locate a pin or item that displays personal pronouns or sexual orientation, both important ways to respect people's identities.'

Leading the way out into the street, you looked around.

You didn’t remember seeing a shop with a prominent pin or badge.

"A pin or badge."

You looked up at the tall woman, her eyebrows furrowed in question.

Raking your eyes over her form, you found a brooch on her jacket, one you knew she wore often.

Lips.

"Where did you get that brooch?"

She peered down at her brooch, straightening it out as a light blush overtook her cheeks.

"Oh, my brooch. I got it at the antique shop, Uriah's Heap."

Uriah's Heap, a shop so very, well, out of the ordinary.

It was your favorite.

You stared at her for a moment hoping she would catch on, until her eyes widened in excitement.

"Let's go!" she smiled, grabbing your hand as she drug you to the shop.

༻༺

You stood outside of Uriah's Heap, finding a large progressive pride flag pin on their window.

You knew this was a scavenger hunt, a race of some sort, but you always loved searching for hidden treasures in the shop that many people didn’t appreciate.

Following the principal, she found her way to the antique jewelry.

Choosing a vintage locket, you placed it on the counter and found a basket of pins staring back at you.

"Hello, did you find something of interest?"

The woman, who you remembered enjoyed chaga tea after working here on outreach day, peered down at you.

"Yes, may I purchase this?"

Peering over at the tall woman, she held a brooch up to you.

"Do you think this is nice, darling?"

A brooch which you thought resembled an eye. Very fitting for the principal and her unique look.

"It's beautiful, it matches your bracelet."

She smiled gratefully down at you, placing it on the counter.

"You are very perceptive" she remarked.

The lady rang up both items, the principal speaking up.

"Oh, I'll purchase that separate."

You shook your head at her with a sly smile, "I got it Principal Weems."

After purchasing your items, the principal retrieved the fourth clue and stamped the book yellow.

'What LGBTQ+ novel, written by Sheridan Le Fanu, preceded Dracula?'

You had read this book recently, an easy clue, really.

"Carmilla"

The woman looked down at you in surprise, nodding her head.

"Great novel, absolutely the best. I'm proud" she winked.

You smiled, gaze landing on the floor bashfully before peering back over at the pins in the basket.

The woman noticed and sorted through them. "Hmm, so many options. Would you like one?"

You watched as she held them in her hands to you, every option they had available.

There were so many colors, so many flags and pronouns.

You hummed and hawed over them, knowing which you wanted to chose, but still unsure.

"Well, I think I like this one."

The principal chose one; red, orange, white and pink stripes staring back at you.

Your mouth opened in shock as you watched her pin it to her jacket.

She smiled mischievously, "What's the matter, darling?"

The lesbian flag, something you didn't see often included in pride merchandise.

"I, uh, are you…" you stuttered.

The woman chuckled, straightening out the pin. "A lesbian?"

You nodded speechless as you stared up at her, thrill running through your veins.

She clasped her hands together and gave one nod, a bright smile as she batted her eyelashes your way.

Her support, her happiness, the confidence that she had, it made you want to cry.

You were so, so happy for her, you were so very proud.

Proud of her for her openness, proud of her for her representation, proud of her for being her true self, and for showing others that it was okay to be gay.

Grateful for her bravery, to show others that they were not alone.

You took a deep breath, "Can I have the same one?"

She dug through the pins, finding the very same flag and holding it out to you, "May I?"

You nodded, presenting your jacket to her.

She pinned in on, running a hand soothingly over your arm.

"I'm so very proud of you, darling."

You breathed in heavily, taking in her sincere and caring smile before meeting her gaze.

"I'm proud of you too, Principal Weems. And I'm so happy for you, thank you."

It was all the principal had wished for on this day, to help at least one person through their journey. To help you present yourself, to help you feel like you deserved to be seen, to help you feel proud.

"Of course, love. Now, where can we find the novel 'Carmilla'?"

Well, the library or bookstore, of course. But, you took a bet that Carmilla may not be at the library, so you headed to the bookstore.

༻

5. Crow bookshop

You retrieved the second last clue, stamping the book green.

'Locate the basket prepared for a festive outdoor meal, filled with colorful snacks and drinks. Perfect for a celebration under the open sky.'

The principal looked down at you in contemplation. "The Basket, like the restaurant?"

You shrugged your shoulders, unsure of where else they would be referring to.

༻༺

You arrived at 'The Basket', a restaurant just before the beach.

There were a few specials, a fruit basket, a flight of ciders, and a flight of sliders.

You knew the principal was a fan of burgers.

"Are you hungry?"

The tall woman looked down at you, smiling as she read over the special.

"Chipotle, Bacon and cheese, Veggie, Bean, Texas, and Chicken sliders. Would you like to share?"

You looked over the menu, rereading what she had just rhymed off.

Nodding, you asked, "What's a flight?"

She chuckled, ordering the special for you both.

"You're about to find out."

Sitting at a table on the back patio, you settled down across from the principal.

A moment silence, you looked her up and down, questioning many things.

An older, wiser being. A beautiful one who appeared to be pretty open, who seemed like she'd understand, who seemed like she cared.

"How did you know that you liked women and not men?"

The woman raised her gaze to you, lips stretching into a sad smile.

She took a deep breath and smoothed a napkin over her lap.

"Well, when I was your age, this small town was all that I knew, just like you.

I knew that I didn't feel the same as my peers, I never cared to talk about boys, I never really fit in in the way that I hoped to.

One day I realized that I wouldn't at all mind kissing my friend, in fact I longed to" she chuckled. "Representation was lacking, but what little of it there was, it helped me realize how I felt as I grew. It's hard to accept yourself, for many reasons, but when you try to push it away, it doesn't get any better, it never changes."

Your voice was hoarse as you asked in confirmation. "It never changes?"

She shook her head, "It never changes. You have to decide for yourself.

Do whatever makes you happy, feel whatever makes you happy, no matter how different it is, no matter how alone you may feel."

You pursed your lips as tears built in your eyes, she was right, of course she was.

"Well, it helps knowing I'm not the only one."

The woman nodded her head in agreement, wallowing over the memories of her feeling alone, of her heartbreakingly coming to the realization of how she truly felt, of who she really was.

It brought her sadness, to know that others felt the same; perhaps even worse.

"The journey is not an easy one, it's not for the weak. You have to know that you're strong, and you're worthy, always."

The sliders were placed on your table, averting her attention.

She carefully cut them all in half, holding up a piece of the bacon and cheese as she offered the rest to you.

"Bon appétit."

The principal stamped the book blue and picked up the last clue.

'"At midnight, in the month of June, I stand beneath the mystic moon." What establishment is named after this poet?'

She looked down at you with a finger pointed your way.

You scrunched your eyebrows, Edgar Allan Poe.

The only establishment could be, "The Poe!"

You and the principal laughed, shouting the answer at the same time.

༻༺

You headed to The Poe, a small museum and shop on the beach that sold trinkets, drinks, and ice cream.

Principal Weems stamped the last page purple, turning in the scavenger hunt book to the shop.

"Well, congratulations! You were fifth to finish the scavenger hunt."

You laughed, fifth place.

The tall woman smiled down at you with a wink, "We're losers."

You both were, in fact, losers.

After collecting your prizes and ordering ice cream, which the principal insisted on, you made your way to a bench on the beach.

You watched the woman with great interest. An intelligent, interesting woman she was. A powerful, selfless woman. A perceptive woman, a force to be reckoned with.

You hoped and prayed that you would grow up to be at least half the person that she was.

The principal caught your interest with a low chuckle.

"I'm having lots of fun with you, love, but I'm sorry you had to spend the day with your principal."

You tilted your head in confusion; you were not sorry, not one bit.

"I'm not sorry. Today was the best day I've had in awhile. Thank you."

The woman pouted, opening her arms to you; you gladly embraced her.

With a deep breath you pulled away, placing your hand in her soft reassuring one.

"So what happened with your friend? The one you wanted to kiss?"

The principal chuckled remorsefully. "Nothing."

Looking out over the water, her smile turned to a frown.

"I wanted to hold her, to protect her from men with all the fury I had grown.

They don't see her beauty like I do, they don't care to.

But unfortunately, it's the same old story."

She turned to you with sad eyes.

"A girl cries over a girl and that girl cries over a guy, and well…

it goes on and on and on,

and it doesn't stop.

It never stops."

You were just like her, perhaps there was hope for you.

Just then, fireworks lit up the darkness of the beach. All colors of the spectrum were on display, but all you saw was red, orange, white, and pink.

Your attention was then diverted to a girl wearing a Nevermore uniform as she made her way to you.

She waved, "Hi Principal Weems."

She then looked to you. "Hi Y/N"

She spoke with the principal as you analyzed her. You recognized her, but you didn't know her name, so how did she know yours?

The girl's eyes landed on you once again, meeting your gaze. You didn't want to ask.

"Aura, I like your pin." A sly tone to the older woman's voice.

You followed the principals gaze to the pin on Aura's jacket, then you peered down at the pin attached to yours.

"Thanks Principal Weems" she smiled, eyes slowly trailing to the woman's pin, then to yours.

Your eyebrows furrowed, and Aura's raised in surprise.

"Oh, we all have the same pin!"

The principal chuckled, gazing down at you with a bright smile.

"See darling, you're never alone. I promise you're not the only one."

#larissa weems #gwendoline christie #principal larissa weems #gwendolineuniverse #wednesday netflix #principal weems #lesbian #larissa weems fanfic #larissa weems x reader #happy pride 🌈#wlw

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hina-hina · 2 years ago

Note

Last request! (I apologise if i request too much) I have a funny idea inside of my head, Could you do a dad headcanons of Ghost, Soap, Alejandro + König found out his and F! s/o's child has a innocent crush or how they act towards on their crush. How the 141 boys would react?

I can imagine if their child is a boy, I think they might tease their child about the "crush" thingy. If their child is a girl, ohh boy I think they're a type of a dad who said "no boys until you're 18 young lady" or being protective dad.

bonus: I think some of them might cry on their child for being " grown up so fast"

Hello again!! Don't worry about requesting too much, I love every request I get!! But this idea is so stinkin cute （〃｀ 3′〃）Thank you for requsting and I hope you enjoy!!

We have a healthy mix of boy!child and girl!child, I really just used whatever I felt fit the best within the character. The child in this is like middle school age or younger here.

→ COD Masterlist

|| How Ghost, Soap, Alejandro + König Would React When Their Child Has a Crush ||

Warnings: Some angst (not really)

Female!Reader // Romantic + Platonic

|| Ghost

The child is a girl because Girl Dad Ghost brain rot is real

I have mentioned this 100 times but he is observant, right?

So he is back from base for a leave and decides he is gonna go and pick up your child from school

And while he is awkwardly standing among the other parents, he notices you talking with a young boy

He is horrified because you are blushing profusely

Doesn't say anything to his kid but as soon as he comes home and the kid runs off to her room, he just latches onto you and is like "We need to talk."

And your immediately worried because you think something is seriously wrong

Then he just tells you about her blushing at the boy and you let out a little relieved laugh

But then you tell him there is nothing wrong with someone her age having a harmless crush but he can't help it

He is incredibly protective and knows just how cruel young boys can be

He just doesn't want her to get hurt

Expect the next time that he goes to pick her up, he is just glaring this boy down

If they do start dating, the boy better be prepared for the most terrifying shovel talk ever

|| Soap

We will do a boy child for him

So, I imagine the kid is like smiling at his phone or something at family dinner

And Soap jokingly asks if he is talking to a girl and when the kid blushes and tells him to stop he knows he unintentionally was correct

He is very quiet all throughout dinner until the two of you go to bed

You ask him what's wrong and he just starts silently crying because his son is growing up and he misses so much of it because of work

You just hold him and let him cry it out until morning

You reassure him that you and your son know that his work is important and that you both will also be there for him when he gets back

He has a mildly awkward heart-to-heart with his kid after that about how, despite him having to leave so often, that he would also be there for him

He would then go on to give the kid really bad dating advice

At that point, your quick to swoop in and dispute what Soap says for no other reason to see him get flustered when you explain how he embarrassed himself when the two of you met

|| Alejandro

We will do a female child for him because, once again, girl dad vibes

Very, very, protective girl dad vibes

When you jokingly mention that your daughter is fostering a crush on someone from school? He needs to know everything

What is this boys name, who are his parents, when did you find out

You will need to take a moment to calm him down before telling him anything else

He would want to talk to the boy immediately, despite you telling him that it's nothing more than a innocent crush

When the two of them meet one time, say your daughter introduces him to the two of you at pick-up one day, he is all intimidating glares

The boy is clearly very nervous so you have to shove him to get him to lighten up

When he sees how happy your daughter is when hanging out with him, he softens

"As long as you're happy, hija."

God help this boy if he ever hurts her though-

|| König

To keep it even, we will do a boy child for this one

I see him absolutely loving spending one-on-one time with his kid from time to time

So during one of these outings, he admits that there is a girl he likes at his school

He is in shock because of course the kid is at that age but he is still completely caught off guard

If the kid tries to ask for advice he would just have to be like, "Your mother kinda just threw me over her shoulder and I accepted it."

He is not that big of a flirt but he does know a thing or two

Encourages the kid to be observant (not in a creepy way) to pick up on the things she likes

He overall just encourages his kid to be nice and to pay attention to what she likes

He also encourages him to be more outgoing because he regrets not being as open when pursuing you

When König tells you about this later, your all over him with kisses and "awe"s

And who could blame you truly?

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flodeshe · 2 years ago

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Astro notes 3 🌟 (including synastry)

Hi! Thank you so much for reading my posts!! I really appreciate it!Also big thank you to everyone who commented/liked/reblogged some of my posts, it means a lot to me! Keep in mind that these are just observations based on my experience and may not apply to everyone.I am not an astrologer.Thank you

-I noticed we tend to be attracted to the sign over the IC in the natal chart.It might be because the IC represents our roots,family and ancestors so we may feel familiar with that sign and therefore be attracted to it.

>Ex: I have Aries over my IC , and I tend to be attracted to Aries placements or Mars dominant people.

- Capricorn placements are usually VERY cautious when it comes to their money! As a result, they might come off as a bit stingy. They also tend to save their money.They find security and stability within their financial situation.They are the type of person to think:I have to have enough money because you never know what could happen.Hence, they usually give a pretty big legacy to their children.

-- I don’t know why but I have seen many boys being born in February and having lighter eyes( blue/green) and also lighter hair (usually blonde hair)!!

Now, a synastry observation about a placement overlay:

-Moon in 3rd house overlay in synastry ✨: I’ts a nice placement for communication. Personally, I have it with a childhood friend and communication is really important between us.When we talk to each other, we usually laugh a lot and I feel like we understand each other in a way.I think a reason why I enjoy this overlay might be due to Gemini rulling my 7th house which is the house of partnership and originally ruled by Venus(the planet of love) and I also have Moon in the 7th house.Moreover, the 3rd house and 7th house are both ruled by air signs which is why I may like 3rd house synastry or air houses overlays in general.And Gemini rules the 3rd house (of siblings,communication,intellect..) so.. With this overlay, the persons involve may like making jokes and even sometimes tease the other, most specifically with their words. Moreover, it can also means that even if the 2 persons are not considered as talkative, well, they might be very chatty when they are together.Also, one could talk a lot about the other to their friends or family without noticing it.Great placement for friendship (it could also be good with romantic relationships of course!).

So talking about synastry, I want to remember you that even if there are aspects or placements considered “best” or "worst" for romantic relationships, we all have different birth charts and we are all human beings with different perspectives and personalities, hence before checking a synastry , CHECK THE BIRTH CHART! Because, you are certainly more familiar/comfortable with certain placements/signs than others.Also, a synastry chart does not make a relationship.

Let’s talk about Adonis asteroid in synastry :

- Adonis (2101)😍 , is an asteroid which represents our “ideal man”, the type of men you are attracted to.I recommend to check its aspects and placement in your birth chart if you are interested in men.Jupiter in astrology, represents the husband. And I have Jupiter conjunct Adonis with 2 guys I thought were my ideal type and who got me faking scenarios in my head like “us getting married”lol..Also, I know a friend who has that aspect with a guy she had a big crush on and who looked like her “type”..

Me falling for them lol (found on Pinterest):

-Aquarius placements in composite or even Uranus contacts in synastry feels like:

(found on Pinterest, again lol(;

-I really LOVE Moon trine/sextile Uranus in synastry (platonic or romantic relationship) because it feels like the 2 accept each other's "weirdness" in a way.Like when you are together you are goofy and you feel you could do anything and the other person wouldn't judge you.LOVE IT!!ps: Venus in Aquarius😁 here

That's it for today.Thank you so much for reading!You can tell me if you have experiencied any of these placements! Sending love and light😘! Have an amazing day !

#astro notes #astro observations #synastry #astro blog #astrology #moon #Capricorn #aquarius #uranus #attraction #astro #astro posts

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ramp-it-up · 2 years ago

Text

Taste

Pairing: Mob Boss! Sam Wilson x Rumlow! Reader; Bucky Barnes x Reader (platonic); Steve Rogers x Reader (platonic); Brock Rumlow x Reader (platonic)

Word Count: around 4K

Warnings: 18+ As always, MINORS DNI, Not Beta’d. All mistakes my own. Childhood hoods, childhood crush, childhood nicknames based upon appearance, young Brock, Steve, Bucky and Sam, skinny Stevie Rogers, sibings being sibings, bratty behavior, Angst, allusion to underage drinking and crime, toxic parents, protective bothers, allusions to underaged drinking, bratty behavior, a punch in the nose (accidental), bloody nose, shirtless Sam, kind of innocent reader, fingering, oral sex (female receiving) loss of virginity, pain during sex, p in v, raw sex (wrap it or don’t tap it), praise kink, after care. This entire fic is comprised of two flashbacks.

A/N: This is in the same AU Try a Little Tenderness and The Representative, and comes directly after Addicted To You. The AU is called This Thing of Ours.

I no longer operate a taglist. Follow @rampitupandread to be notified when I post.

I Do NOT consent to my work being reposted, translated or presented on any other blog or site other than by myself.

You were ten years old, it was 2002, and you were spending the summer in Brooklyn at your father’s house.

It was long before the mob war that he created which separated your brother Brock from his best friends.

And it was a time that would change you forever.

The July afternoon was hot and so was the block. Music was blaring from the speakers of someone’s radio and there was a buzz in the air: adolescence, ambition and a potential for violence.

You a slave to a page in my rhyme book/Gettin' big money, playboy, your time's up/Where them gangstas at?/ Where them dimes at?/They shootin'! Aw, made you look

They called you Bunny because of your teeth and your size. But you were a scrapper and could stand up for yourself. Your father taught you that.

You also had a smart mouth, and roasted anyone who dared talk about you or your family.

Your mother taught you that.

When you came to your father’s house while your mother took her annual girls trip that summer, you found that your big brother was suddenly different. Gone was the quiet gangly 12 year old who drew up plans for world domination in composition books in his room; a wiry 13 year old who had friends who were just as scrappy and hungry as he was had taken his place.

Little Stevie Rogers never backed down from a fight. That’s where his best friend Bucky Barnes came in, backing him up when Stevie was against the wall. Brock was the kid with vision, the one who had a plan to get them where they wanted to be.

In power.

Your brother tried to ignore you, but you trailed after him because there was nothing better to do. One day, you sat in the stoop and watched him and his friends working to open the fire hydrant across the street from your dad’s house.

Your brother felt your eyes on them as you hugged your knees.You were a sight, bushy hair, glasses, braces, and an intense look on your face. He felt bad.

For a second.

“Why don’t you go on over there and play dolls with Shandy and “n’em, Bunny?”

You glanced over at the girls playing on the next stoop, their braids wilting in the sun. They were playing with stiff dolls with stiff plastic hair and legs that didn’t bend. Not your scene.

You just poked your tongue out at him and moved to stand in the water now dripping out of the hydrant, your strawberry sneakers with the bows getting drenched. You smiled down at them, thinking of how mad your mother would be.

“Aw, c’mon Brock. She ain’t hurtin’ nobody. Let her have some fun.”

Bucky’s blue eyes shone down at you and you pushed up your glasses and looked up at him, squinting in the sun. Stevie’s bony elbow bumped into yours as you hopped to avoid the bruising gush of water along the pavement as they succeeded in their quest.

“Sorry.”

Stevie smiled at you. He really was a nice boy, even though he was pugnacious. Bucky was a smart ass, however.

“You don’t want her to melt, do ya? Your old man would skin you alive.”

Stevie and Bucky laughed as Brock scowled. He didn’t have time for benevolence or little sisters. He had plans. He shook his head.

“Focus. We gotta stick with the plan. Sammy Wilson is coming over to talk about what’s happening tonight, and she doesn’t need to be around.”

You flipped Brock off behind Bucky and Stevie’s back, and he just scowled harder at you. No matter what you did, he didn’t engage with you like you wanted him to. How boring.

Bucky whistled.

“Wilson is fast. That dude can run his ass off.”

Sam was on the track team at the high school down the block.

“I can beat him.”

Stevie puffed his bird chest out and Brock and Bucky laughed at him. You felt bad.

“I believe you Stevie.”

He grinned at you and ducked his head.

Brock rolled his eyes and you flipped him off.

He pointed back at you.

“I’m sick of you. I’m telling Dad.”

You thrilled at the attention.

“Go ahead, I’ll tell him what you’re up to.”

Brock grabbed you by the shirt, snarling.

“You better not say a fucking word.”

You pulled away and landed on the pavement, your knee skinned. You kneeled, bending over to look at it, and to keep your tears inside, when you heard the voice of an angel.

“Need some help?”

You looked up into a face haloed by the sun. You reached for the hand that was offered and stood up to look into the face of 14 year old Sammy Wilson. And you were done for.

That gap tooth smile, those eyes. That skin.

You stared at him as you registered laughter around you. Sam spoke again.

“You okay?”

He seemed like he really wanted to know how you were.

“Y-yeah.”

He chuckled.

“You better clean that off.”

Sam took your hand and led you back over to the hydrant. He kneeled down, cupped water in his hand and cleaned off your knee.

“Sssssss!”

It stung.

“Sorry. But it’s for your own good.”

You felt warm, and not just from the heat, as you let him take care of you.

You stared at him as he finished.

“That’s the best I can do. You need to get a band-aid.”

“Okay.”

You would do anything he said. Sam looked up at you and it was like the air was sucked out of your body. You didn’t know what this feeling was, but it intrigued you.

“No problem. I got a little sister at home. Sarah. Just looking out. You gotta be careful.”

He smiled as he stood up and walked away.

You watched him move over to the other boys, forever changed because that’s when you fell in love with Sammy Wilson.

You spent that last summer in Brooklyn as the unofficial mascot of the Savage Crims, the newest gang on the block. Steve, Bucky, and Sam adopted you and you became scout, lookout, and spy. It was the best summer of your life.

Your mother moved to Los Angeles that fall and took you with her. She started dating more legitimate businessmen, meaning the same type of men as your father, just with generational wealth and privilege.

It was a different world than New York. You went to fancy private schools and learned how to play the game. You were now a “friendly black hottie,” sidekick to the main character in every scene.

But you were smart.

As you grew older, you watched and learned and played the part, and soon, you were running the game. By the time you graduated from high school, you were the center of attention, just the way you liked it.

Your mother was engaged, and you and she were on the cusp of something she’d dreamed of her entire life: being iconic.

You started your first two years in college at UCLA, but you convinced your mother that fashion was how you would enable yourself to meet the best type of men, and that Parsons School of design in New York was the place to be.

You acted as if you were uninterested in reconnecting with Brock, who your mom thought hadn’t contacted you in eight years aside from telling you that your father had died.

You convinced your mother that you wouldn’t venture off the island of Manhattan, and she believed you because she was in the midst of applying the full court press on her man.

The truth was, you and Brock kept in touch regularly, and you were eager to see your brother again.

And his friends.

So you flew back East in 2012, 10 years after you left, butterflies threatening to fly out of your mouth as you landed at Laguardia.

After a few weeks in the city establishing your dominance, you showed up at the boys’offices unannounced. He knew you were in town, and told you about how successful he was now, with the help of Bucky and Steve.

And Sam.

You were going to go see just how successful everyone was.

And how lucky you could get.

“Who the hell is that?”

Bucky peered at the camera about the buzzer to the brownstone. Steve came over to look as well.

“It can’t be… Brock, c’mere.”

“What is it? We’re trying to work out this next shipment…”

Brock looked at the camera as Sam watched his jaw drop from the table.

“Who is it?”

“Fuck! That’s Bunny!”

Brock backed up as Steve pressed the buzzer. He opened the door to wait for you to climb the stairs.

“Stevie!?”

Your excited shriek was muffled as the now beefy blonde picked you up immediately to twirl you around into the loft space.

You stood back, feeling his muscles through his shirt.

“Wow! You have filled out.”

“I must have learned from you…”

Steve looked you up and down when you heard a roar in your ear.

“Bunny!”

Bucky gave you a bear hug to where you couldn’t breathe. You pounded his back and punched him in the pecs when he let go. You caught your breath and then turned to Brock, whose eyes were shining.

“God, you’re grown up. You’re not my little Bunny anymore.”

“Shut up, stupid.”

You embraced your brother, surprised at your emotion. You were choking up, about to sob in his arms.

“I missed you.”

You whispered into his shirt.

“Missed you too, kid.”

You let him go and you dabbed at your eyes. You heard someone clear their throat and looked over to see Sam standing next to you.

“Hey Sammy!”

You tried to make your voice light, so as not to betray your feelings. You’d replayed this moment in your mind a million times.

He was a man now. And damn. What a man. Tall, dark and handsome. But with that same smile.

Sam tried to be cool. Brock was right. You weren’t little any more. A full grown woman. He tried to not check you out because he knew Brock was watching, but damn. You were beautiful. All over.

“Well? Can I get a hug?”

Sam unfroze himself.

“Of course.”

You seemed to melt into him, your breasts pressed against his chest, his lats seeming to mold around you. He could do this all day.

When Sam opened his eyes, he saw Bucky’s raised eyebrow and he released you, stepping back and over to the table to try and pretend that all of his senses were not tuned on you.

“How’s Sarah?”

Sam smiled.

“Good. You should call her.”

You smiled back

“I will.”

Bucky interrupted.

“Tell me all about your socialite world, Ms.Y/L/N.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Rumlow ‘til I die.”

You locked eyes with Sam.

“Who does a girl have to screw to get a drink around here?”

You joked and the room fell silent.

“No one.” Brock deadpanned. “And you’ll wait another year until you’re legal.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Yes, like everything is legal up in here.”

It was just like old times: you giving them all hell. Although Sam’s hell was different now.

Bucky handed you a bottle of water.

“Thanks Buck!”

You sat and crossed your legs across from Sam and Brock.

“So. How’s things?”

You four talked for hours, ordering pizza from Sal’s and shooting the shit. It was almost midnight when they drew straws to see who would take you home. Sam drew the short straw.

Lucky him.

You rode in the passenger seat of Sam’s BMW, arms folded across your chest, an adorable bratty pout on your delectable lips. He’d been watching that mouth all night, torturing himself with visions of those in various places on his body. He was getting hard.

Sam stifled a moan which he tried to play off.

You jumped a little when he growled at you.

“What the hell is wrong with you, little girl?”

You turned toward him, mad.

“First of all, I’m not a little girl any more.”

“Yeah, Right.”

It sounded dismissive, but Sam was really just agreeing with you.

“Second of all, y’all really drew straws to take me home?”

You glared at him as he laughed at your outrage.

“I’m not the little tagalong from years ago. I didn’t even need you to take me home. I could call anyone to come get me. To come get this.”

You held up your flip phone and indicated your body. Sam’s dark eyes took you in and felt possessive. Holy shit, he was in deep.

“I’m sure you got lots of hardheads after you.”

Sam clenched his jaw and looked back at the road as he drove to The Village.

“We’re busy men, Bunny. We got important work to do. Brock will be working for a couple more hours, Bucky is running the streets, and Steve probably has a date right now…”

“At 1 am? You mean a booty call.”

Sam continued, ignoring you.

“But what will never change is us protecting you. We’re family, Bunny.”

You pushed his head and he glared at you.

“Same little boys is all I see. Important crimes, you mean.”

You huffed back into your seat, your breasts bouncing in your spandex dress. Sam fought to keep his eyes on the road.

“I’ll show you a little boy. Don’t try me, Bunny.”

You turned back to him, batting your eyes, but your attitude on 1000.

“I’d love to try you Sammy.”

Sam had the urge to take you by the throat and slide you up and down his dick, but he just squeezed the steering wheel harder, trying to ignore you.

“Hey Sammy.”

He sideyed you. Your voice was too sweet.

“Let’s go get a drink.”

“Fuck no!”

“C’mon, don’t be a prude. I drank all the time in Europe this summer.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, this isn’t Europe, and I don’t give a fuck.”

You sat back in your seat, grumbling and frustrated. He would never see you as anything but little Bunny. By the time you got to campus, you didn’t even wait for Sam to park before you jumped out. He caught up with you, long legs gaining ground quickly. He grabbed your arm.

“Hey!”

“Let me go!”

You turned around and popped him in the nose by reflex.

“Shit!”

Sam held his face and doubled over.

“Oh, my damn! I’m sorry Sammy. Let me see.”

“Stop…”

Sam pulled away from you and as his hands moved, blood spattered all over his shirt and the concrete below him.

“Oh no. Oh no. I’m so sorry.”

Sam was moving away.

“Just.. leave me alone. I’m okay…”

“No you’re not. I’m sorry Sammy. Come up to my place. Please. I’ll clean you up.”

Sam opened his watery eyes to see your remorseful face and let you lead him up to your apartment, up three flights of stairs. You took him immediately to the bathroom and you washed him up, giving him a wet washcloth and telling him to lean his head forward, indicating the toilet.

Sam sat down and did as he was told, pinching the bridge of his nose.

You sat on the floor below him and stared up at him, hugging your knees.

“I’m so so so so sorry Sammy…”

He looked at you, silent, and continuing to pinch his nose.

You stayed with him for 15 minutes until he stopped bleeding and stood up again, cleaning up a bit more. You felt so bad.

You stared at his shirt as he stood.

“Jeez, Sammy, take that shirt off, let me soak it.”

Sam remained silent, but took off his shirt.

You bent over to get some hydrogen peroxide from the cabinet, scrubbed the shirt a little, then soaked it in cold water.

Sam was watching your ass, almost feral at the fact that you were such a brat. You needed to be tamed. But you were Brock’s kid sister. He was so torn.

“You can grab a sweatshirt out of my –”

You turned around toward and stopped mid thought, mind blank at the sight of Sam’s shirtless form.

“Holy shit.”

Sam gave you a lopsided grin.

“You keep sweatshirts in your holy shit?”

You didn’t even hear the tease, just licked your lips as you stepped toward him.

“Sammy?”

Sam gulped and tried to calm down. But the look on your face was everything at the moment. He knew he probably should have, but he didn’t stop you as you entered his space. You reached your hand up to his nose.

“Are you ok?”

“I think so.”

Sam reached up and manually shifted his nose.

“Probably just broken for the third time. Been in a couple of scraps.”

Your fingers entwined with his and you brought them to your lips. Tears started to slide down your face.

“I’m sorry.”

Sam wiped the tears from your face with his thumbs.

“Don’t cry. I’m ok.”

He pulled you in for a hug, and then leaned back.

As you looked up at him, he whispered, “So damn beautiful, Bunny…”

Suddenly, he was kissing your face, collecting your salt water with his lips. Then, he pulled away.

“What are we doing?”

You began to nuzzle his palm, while your hands reached for his pecs.

“Stop thinking so much, Sammy…”

“Thinking’s what got us into this..”

You nodded.

“D’you know how long I’ve been thinking about this?”

Your eyes followed your hands as they traced his chest, then his sternum down to his happy trail. His stomach clenched at the sensation. He was too far gone.

“How long?”

“From the first time someone tried to be with me sexually. I never really wanted to, I mean I’ve messed around, I can suck your soul out, but I’ve never wanted anyone inside of me.”

You were tracing his hard on outside of his pants, your face upturned now.

“Are you trying to say that…you’re…”

You nodded again.

“You were always in the back of my mind, Sam. I only want you.”

Sam tilted his head downward and captured your lips in a kiss, as though it were inevitable.

You both drew back and then your lips crashed together again, your bodies pressed up against each other urgently.

The kiss was everything you ever imagined and everything Sam didn't know that he wanted. Your hands went for his belt buckle. At that moment, Sam placed his hands on your arms and pushed you away from him.

“We can’t do this.”

You nodded, stepped back and took a deep breath.

“You’re right. You’re one of my brother’s best friends. No need for you to pop my cherry or anything.”

You two stared at each other. Then you licked your lips. Sam cocked his eyebrow, trying to restrain himself from the animalistic urges your filthy mouth gave him.

“You little brat.”

Sam grabbed your neck to pull you close to him. He reached down to pull your skirt up and he rubbed your ass like he was trying to shine it. He then put both hands on you to spread your cheeks apart. Your wetness was evident in the sound. You buried your face in his chest, embarrassed.

“Sounds like you really want this.”

For once in your life, you were speechless, and Sam reached down and angled your head up so he could look at you.

“I need you tonight Sam.”

You kissed him again and tried to get on your knees. But Sam stopped you and led you over to your bed.

“You’re the queen right now.”

You pulled off your dress and stood there in your bra and panties as Sam pulled you toward your bed to lay beside him, his hand caressing down the side of your body.

He moved his fingers over the lace of your bra to find your nipple, and when it was discovered, he pinched it to see your reaction. The way your eyes closed halfway and your mouth opened was everything. He reached behind you to expertly unhook your bra and looked down on you.

“You're so beautiful.”

And he dipped his head running his tongue around the edges of your areola, making your nipple rock hard against his breath. Then, he started sucking in earnest, his huge hand going to tweak and play with the other. You threw your head back in earnest, the feeling in your cunt growing with each pull of his mouth. You started moaning.

“You mean to tell me…. That no one has ever… had the pleasure…”

Sam asked the important question between having his mouth on you. He couldn’t get enough.

You shook your head and furrowed your brow. It was taking you out of the moment. Sex was just a means to an end for you up until now.

“I suck them off, and they’re satisfied. S’not a big deal….. Ahhhhh.”

Sam stopped what he was doing to look into your eyes.

“It is a big deal, Bunny. You deserve everything.”

Sam tenderly kissed your lips as he pulled your panties off, and then returned to your breasts. Tears slipped down your face to the pillow beneath your head as he finally parted your legs. His hand, led by his long middle finger slid down your wet, wet folds to play in your slick.

“Mmmmmm. That’s that shit I like.”

Sam rumbled in his chest, and the vibrations reached your nipple, causing you to arch into his mouth and hand. Sam’s fingers worked your clit and you could feel it get hard and plucky. You heard the sloshing wetness of your arousal. So did Sam. He pulled off to look at you again.

“You ever play with yourself?”

The look on his face was part possession and part genuine concern.

“Of course. But not this goooddddd…. Shit Sam. I just hit it and quit it…. Fuckkkk that feels good.”

Sam was plucking your nipple with one hand and rubbing your clit in expert circles with the other, watching the ecstasy on your face as you neared your peak.

“C’mon for me now. Cum. right here in my hand…Yes…. That’s a girl…”

It hit you like a ton of bricks.

“Holy mother of……ssshhhhhhiiiiittttt! Sam! Fuckkkk fuck fuck fuck!”

You tried to grab his hand to move it away, but he was strong. Oh so strong. He didn’t stop.

“Sam… I… Sam stop..I can't…”

“You can, and you will. Take it. You’re tough. You can take it.”

You convulsed as your pulses slowed down and you tried to relax.

“That’s a girl. Just give it to me. Let me have it. Love that shit. You’re beautiful right now, you know that?”

You calmed under his praise and got into the groove of his pleasure.

Sam’s fingers started exploring you, one of them sliding easily inside you, so he added another, but when he reached the second knuckle, you clamped down hard.

“Shit, Bunny. You’re so so tight.”

Sam looked at you with lust and you could feel his cock throbbing against your thigh, his precum making a mess.

“Thought that first one would have loosened you up. Looks like you need at least one more.”

Your eyes grew wide as he slid down your body, fingers still inside you, but now his mouth clamping around your clit, which was still sensitive. Your knees closed around his head and he pried them off with one hand.

“Take it Bunny. You deserve.”

It was the last thing he said before he destroyed your soul with his mouth. He licked and sucked and lapped, and his fingers slid inside you and curled the spark of pain muted by the fireworks behind your eyes as you came harder than you ever had in your life, including a few minutes earlier.

“Hnnnnh, hunnnnnnhh. Sam…”

He was kneeling up now, grabbing for his pants and a condom. When you saw the foil packet, you stopped him.

“No Sammy. Wanna feel you.”

Sam raised his eyebrow.

“Mom put me on the pill when I was 13. It’s like a vitamin now. I’m good.”

Sam nodded and his thumb went to your still vibrating clit as he swiped his head in your viscous slit. He managed to pop his thicker-than-you-thought head inside you, but you yelped in pain as he tried to slide in.

He leaned down, arms on either side of your head as you clutched his shoulders.

“You good?”

You nodded, tears in your eyes as you smiled.

“I want it, I need it. Give it to me.”

Sam looked at you, shook his head and smiled.

He slid inside you slowly, seeming to grow wider and longer with each inch that he gave you. The burning between your legs was soothed by his praise and tender kisses on your forehead.

“There you go. Feels so so good for me Bunny. You’re doing so good. I can’t believe this… Make me wanna cum already. This pussy is so tight. And so good. Better than I’ve ever had…”

Sam relaxed you, and you began to enjoy that he was taking you apart. When your moans matched his thrusts was when he started to give it to you, his will power waning.

You were the epitome of desire.

He hiked your leg above his hip so that he could dig deeper and his thumb found your clit again.

“One more Bunny. Just one more…”

He felt you flutter around him and he gripped the base of his cock.

“Sammy….”

“Yes… oh… fuck yes….”

“Ohhh! Ah!”

Your cream gushed around him as you came and Sam grunted and let go inside you.

“Fuuuuucckkkkkkkk aahhhhhhh ahhhh. Fuck!”

Sam felt like he his balls would never empty and he slumped on top of you, feeling your arms snake around him to hold him.

“Mmmm… Sammy.”

He could hear the smile in your voice. He leaned up off of you and kissed your nose, looking into your eyes.

“Are you okay?”

You smiled at him and Sam’s heart was gone. You had it locked up.

“Better than okay.”

He kissed you again.

“Stay right here.”

He went to the bathroom, coming backwith a washcloth and tenderly cleaned you up. You heard the bath running.

“You’re going to be sore.”

“Yes. I’m going to feel you for a week.”

Sam grinned and you saw his cock come to life. You smirked and gingerly moved ot get out of bed.

“Join me in the bathtub Sammy. Wanna try the wet and wild….”

Sam was hypnotized by the sway of your ass.

He didn’t think of the implications of what just happened. He’d had a taste, and his hunger was voracious. He just wanted you.

And that would become a problem.

Reblogging is always a good thing if you liked it.

#sam wilson #sam wilson x reader #mob boss! Sam Wilson x Rumlow! Reader #sam wilson x rumlow! reader #mob boss! sam wilson #this thing of ours au #sam wilson x black! reader #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #brock rumlow #brock rumlow x reader #mob!steve rogers #mob! bucky #mob! sam wilson #Sam x Bunny #ttoo

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bonni · 3 months ago

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Would it be impolite to ask for a guide to your tags? I'm nosy sorry...

Not impolite at all! I'll go through the unintuitive ones that I use the most frequently

** - this is probably the most annoying one to see me put on every post, it's an organizational tag for anything funny. that way I have a single tag to scroll through when I want a laugh

s - kind of the opposite of the above tag, this is for social justice issues and other serious stuff

t - kind of a dump tag for stuff that doesn't fit into either of the other categories. it stands for think or thoughts or whatever because a lot of stuff in this tag is just interesting observations

b - mental health tag, stands for brain

i - insp tag, I just like the single letter better. it basically acts as a qualifier for art I really like

div - stands for divinity. the concept of angels is very important to me and I post about it a lot

then there are my incredibly 2015-core symbol character tags

☆ - adult kinnie tag 😔 I found as I got older that actually tagging character art with #me felt pretty cringe (plus some artists find it disrespectful) so I switched to this

♡ - character crushes

♧ - characters that I have some kind of strong platonic/familial attachment to i.e. I think of them as my sibling, child, etc

◇/♤ - these are general favorite character tags and I kind of just separate them based on Vibes. characters in the spade tag are more likely to be fucked up in a specific way that I find appealing while characters in the diamond tag are just characters I find to be really well-written or comforting

there are other random letter tags I use less frequently like p stands for psychosis, l is a sexuality tag, x has transparent graphics, h is for art or photos that would make good headers for when I want to switch up my mobile theme, etc. you can ask me about specific tags if I missed any you were curious about :)

#mail #blog info

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brown-little-robin · 2 years ago

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Hi Lockwood & Company Girls! I know I enjoy seeing outsiders' perspectives on things I'm obsessed with, so here, have the POV of Robin, who never heard of this series until a few months ago when y'all got obsessed:

Lockwood & Co. is... a tv show. Based on a book series. The show hasn't caught up yet, which makes you sad.

There's a group of ghost... investigators...? Who wear kinda old-fashioned clothing? I think this might not be set in modern times. I bet this is in the 1900s. That century. (I'm not a historical fashion buff, I dunno sldkfjlskdjf)

The ghost investigators are kind of a disaster trio (quartet?) who have that good good Weird Kids Chemistry.

There's one (1) girl main character and her name is Lucy. Lucy has an important necklace. It is probably cursed because she fainted about it. Y'all seem to really like Lucy. The impression is that she's maybe a little headstrong but also tries her best.

There's a few boy main characters. One of them is George. I actually can recognize George by face; he's uhhh not white? I think? Anyway, he has a nice round face and he's a little insane. He's... comic relief? He really likes Lucy, I hope platonically (I adore a good platonic weirdguy/weirdgirl friendship) but whatever. I think if I was watching the show, George might be my favorite. He gives Stiles Stilinski vibes: seems like the Sane OneTM except for when he's doing the crazy board conspiracy thing.

A lot of people have a crush on a guy called Kipps. ??? Apparently it takes a while to warm up to him? I get the feeling that he might be kind of mean or distant at first. I'd give him a fair shot if I was watching the show. We love a good prickly character who eventually gets better.

There's a character with terminal Tired Raccoon Eyes. He looks like a languishing poet and I love him. Cold wet kitten on the unforgiving city streets. I feel like he should be some kind of doomed prophet but maybe I'm just associating him with Fiver Watership Down too much.

The group.... lives together? In an old house? Maybe? Are they actually a found family, or is that just the vibe I'm getting? I think they're all human, no magical or supernatural powers, but I'd love it if they did have powers 👀👀👀

Feel free to tell me if I'm right or wrong about this stuff!

#Lockwood & Co.

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help-i-need-a-cool-username · 2 years ago

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Its the end of the year! Which means its time to post the

Tags That Made Me Smile 2022

The following are a collective list of tags, author notes, and fic names that i saw on ao3 and tumblr that made me either laugh or smile. Ive separated them by fandom but a good amount arent actually fandom specific. Ive added the character names or fandom at the end like {name} to clarify who the tag is talking about

[2021's list]

Author Specific / Non-Specific

i saw canon; acknowledged it; And promply burned it in a dirty trash can thanks; Have this instead

Give me pain I need to feel something

this is self projection thank you coming to my ted talk

Whats that?? Overused tropes that everyone has seen before????? Pfffffffft. This fic is literally just a big mess of "how can I cater to myself and myself only"

you ever just look at your life and wonder how you got here; bc that's what this fic is for me

Don't underestimate me I DO NOT know how long this fan-fic will be

can you tell my target audience is myself

this is content specifically catered to me and no one else

these characters are my landlords and i pay them rent

P O L Y A M O R Y I S M Y P O L Y J A M O R Y

cheek kiss warning

kidnapping isn’t sexy don’t do it

i've never read the archie comics but that's not gonna stop me {archie sonic}

not me writing a whole fic for a ship only i care about; that like maybe two other people ship; rowing this boat is hard but someone has to do it {scourge x fleetway sonic}

ankles don't heal this fast but fuck it i do what i want

no beta we die like men; or rather we drown like the sad shipper with a pool noodle we are

I'm afraid of the Danimals mascot and you should be too

if you're getting flood warnings, don't worry. It's just MY TEARS!

me at every character: anxiety be upon ye

Me (Grabs canon and runs a marathon with it)

Quote: Do you think God stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created (Spy Kids) {tmnt crossover}

Alternate Universe - Monty Python and the Holy Grail

contains dangerous amount of bed based snuggling

(kind of its a very short very homosexual fight scene); and then they kiss.

Hostage situation takes a romantic turn???? Not clickbait????

enemies to frenemies

Improper Use of Pool Noodles

stone cold stoicism meeting determined stupidity

Star Wars

Kanan Jarrus: The Daddening

platonic love is what healed his lonely existence {din djarin}

when in doubt: road trip with the besties {din, boba, fennec}

Soul Eater

found family at its finest {kid, liz, patty}

The Witcher

wife (platonic) {yennskier}

at first I was like haha geralt and Istredd should kiss as a joke…. but bro I don’t think it’s a joke anymore….

Sonic the Hedgehog

Movie!Super Sonic is made out of LOVE no one touch me

Sonics gay awakening I guess

sonic movie 2 made me make an ao3 account lol

Sonic was made to love people

Two Bros Chillin’ in an ER Five Feet Apart ‘cause they’re not gay {sonic x shadow}

the most dangerous thing is to love {shadow}

Trapped in a small box with just enough room to face some feelings {sonic x shadow}

the R in rivalry stand for romance {sonic x shadow}

The L in Rivalry Stands For 'Love' {sonic x shadow}

A Largely Platonic Cave

i love boom!shadow so naturally i made him even more insufferable

Sad-ow

Wachowskis holdin it down in the bg; Absolute champs

I love how Shadow is just so mindbogglingly utterly done with reality

Knuckles is a guardian of all things great and small

“Would you kiss a worm?" “If he was cute as fuck? Yeah.” {wade x stone}

"What is this made of, bendable titanium?!" "INCORRECT. IT IS MADE OF THE FRUSTRATIONS OF MOTHERS EVERYWHERE." {team dark}

featuring a scourge that trips far too much because it's my fic and I said so {scourge x fleetway sonic}

no thoughts just soft hedgehog moments

listen if im going to die at the hands of injured lancelot shit i might as well take advantage of it

Everyone has a crush on Lancelot and I'll die on this hill

fairy Lancelot Fairy Lancelot FAIRY LANCELOT!!!

TMNT

Slow Burn; mostly on april's end of things; casey and donnie are basically on fire right off the bat {tmnt 2012}

Rise!Donnie and 2012!Casey be out there committing arson together for their first date >.>

Please enjoy Casey, the fool, realizing his feelings for Donnie, another fool {tmnt 2012}

Draxum and Splinter are the turtles' dads (it's a reluctant partnership)

just two absolute powerhouses holding each other gently {raph x mona}

“There’s nothing wrong with the way you love, Dee. Goodnight.” {rottmnt}

Wondering what to do when the apocalypse happens? Easy: fly across the country and get Vegas-married. That's definetley an appropriate reaction that won't involve your complicated feelings towards your roommate at all {hypno x warren}

Look rise are weapons of war 12 were accidents and I play with that HARD in this fic

"GET IN THE TURTLE TANK BITCHES WE GOING TO FAMILY THERAPY" {rottmnt}

Donatello is now Dad-Atello {rottmnt}

The other [Casey] is out on a beach in Tahiti; It's what he deserves after surviving the Krang {rottmnt}

Leo is now actively being hunted for sport; (the only sport Donnie is good at) {rottmnt}

These turtles can fit so much trauma

2018 Karai lives because fuck Nick; Casey x Donnie x April are a healthy ship and also fuck nick again

I cant be the only one pissed by Leo's and Karais 'love interest plot'; Leonardo's weird feelings were simply gender envy...Yes that is canon now {tmnt 2012}

What happens when two "dudes" call each other 'girlfriend'; Transgender activities, that's what! {tmnt 2012}

splinter is twice divorced and never married {rottmnt}

Papatello / Dadatello {rottmnt}

draxum's gone from dadxum to grand-dadxum good for him

HOLY FUCKING SHIT YES YES YES YES; GRANDPA BARRY COMING IN CLUTCH

draxum just be like gramps still got it; and by 'it' i mean a complete lack of forethought for care when creating random children

Puts the Bi in Bitchless {rottmnt leo}

its because ninja turtles

feral mamatello {rottmnt}

Marvel

it's the anguish, the self flagellation, the audacity to love the man who annihilate ur nation and killed ur mother; your m o t h e r {black panther}

#hinacu #i cant believe my fav one is from TLG 🤣#star wars rebels #the mandalorian #soul eater #the witcher #sonic the hedgehog #sonic boom #sonic movie #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #rottmnt #black panther #can u tell i'll read just about anything?#expected some things to have really funny tags and they never made the list

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orchidyoonkook · 8 months ago

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I wasn't ignoring you! I've been depressed lately... So I haven't actually been sociable with many people at the moment, or with anyone if you want me to be honest. I would try to be in a healthier mindset before I get back into conversations with people if I am actually able to do so.

But, then I woke up to the news that the guitarist (from a band I listen to) is leaving the band. Because of the timing of the announcement.. I thought, along with many other fans, believed it was just an elaborate April Fool's prank. But it doesn't seem that way. So! Now that brought my depression back hearing that news. My mental health is changing everyday. So I have conflicting feelings about hearing that new today.

So there's that.

I know, I know.. I'm just overreacting about news that I'm not apart of in any way so it shouldn't effect me but it also does at the same time.

I've noticed some emojis don't seem to appear on certain devices so I will have to figure out an emoji that actually appears everywhere, or if it would be easiest to know who is who (while I'm being anonymous).

Yeah.. I'm a private person. I would only reveal things about myself if I am actually comfortable around any other person. I'm always like this all the time. Doesn't matter if you're family, friends, even strangers.

Oh! Yeah. Maybe I should've elaborated those specific relationships in fictional stories. I can see and read dark content, but never content in that way; those ships are limitations that I'm never comfortable with.

I wasn't going to say specific words in you - or anyone else who might have - read my messages. Since I know certain terms may actually be upsetting for some people. Maybe my explanation was just too vague though, so I should've elaborated more with being explicit about that.

Based on labels. My style was between "emo", "goth", "punk", "grunge" and every style in between that you could think of. Ripped jeans have always been my preference in pants.. Usually black shirts, sometimes I'd wear band shirts on occasion or shirts with graphic designs (skulls is an obvious example). Dyed hair, piercings. This is still my own style.

So it doesn't was not a phase for me like most people believed.. There was only a few people who knew that my style wasn't any phase at all either. Anyway! I'm getting too off topic again. Or at least I think I am.

Yes! Guys and girls could be friends. Not every relationship between a guy and girl have romantic or sexual either, there are also the platonic ships and even kinships too. Depending on how close their bonds are.

I rarely had female friends. Not because "I'm just like one of the guys." was the reason. Well.. Maybe I felt that way when I was a preteen that time. But I usually have better connections to guys. Nothing against a lot of women, since I know not every female is the same person when it comes to actions and reactions. I knew many girls who were always horrible to me. Other than people who treated me differently once it's been known that I'm disabled, since people have treated me different once they've found out about my disabilities (like autism for example) - but this is towards people in general though. When it comes to girls; so many female friends were jealous of me for whatever reasons they had. I'm not being conceited. They were actually jealous of me for any reasons I don't know. Any time I had other friends besides her, dating boyfriends or even had a crush on guys, she'd always steal them from me. Which is why I have trust issues with people. The girls I knew end up abusive towards me. Physically, mentally and emotionally. And the few friends, including female friends, worth having in my life were the people who abandoned me. So I've gotten used to being alone now.

And don't get me started on being friends who guys who actually did stop hanging out with me because of jealous girlfriends.. So I was not sure if they hated, distrusted, me. Or they distrusted their boyfriends.

That happened frequently too.. So having every trust issue that I have been through. I tend to push people away, before they push me away.

Yeah. Regardless of sexuality, I just can't see the BTS boys in any ship that isn't a familial ship. Kinships? Something like that. Like.. I am fine with side ships but not main ships. Nothing against people who enjoy those ships though. People should read and write their own stories.

I haven't officially came up with a nickname yet... But you might know by now that I'm the verbose anon who never even knows how to keep messages shorter than what I respond with. That may be a give away.

I finally FINALLY have the time and proper mental space to reply to this!!! Lemme dig in!!

I never thought you were ignoring me dear!! don't worry I know we all have out social limits and sometimes you just need to not be a person for a while in order to recharge. I think it's incredibly kind that you are aware of your mindset when interacting with folks and chose not to interact when you know it isn't in the best place. But please know that I'm here if you ever need to vent or need a little sprinkle of colour or kindness in life. Depression is so hard and I would never treat you differently because of it <3

I'm so so sorry the guitarist from your fav band is leaving 😔. I hope it's so that they can better their health or for the best at least. And if not, i personally find a comfort in knowing that you had them in the band for as long as you did, and you can always go back to old videos and music to reminisce. But again that's a personal coping mechanism of mine.

You're not overreacting. If this is your favourite band I'm going to assume they play rather large role in your life. So it's completely understandable to have big feelings about it. If the guitarist from my favourite band was leaving I would have enormous feelings about it as he's been with the band since 2003. Like. It's something that's a big deal. Your reaction is super valid.

Emoji's are dumb like that sometimes unfortunately. I'm happy to use whichever emoji you'd like. Or a psued if you want. Both work for me. But I usually know it's you , you're memorable!

And I can respect that. I would never push you to not be like that, I just want you to know that I'm here if you need it. The anon part of tumblr is a beautiful feature that way. Talking to strangers who are also friends without the pressure of them actually knowing. It's a very amazing type of human connection. And I find it easier to tell filks things when it can't fall back on me. Like a living diary almost. I find it super cool at least. An annonymous form of community you can't really replicate anywhere else. Beautfiul when you think about it.

Ahhh gotcha!! RE: side ships and pairings. Totally makes sense!!

I'm not someone who can be triggered easily, I semi-regularly consume darker content/ dead dove type (mainly out of loving jealously for the folks who write it so well. my ass could never) so as long as the terms you chose are talked about with respect or in proper terminolog I dont see myself being upset.

Your style sounds like what I would dress as if i had a bit more courage. I'd love to dye my hair again and get so many pericings and tats but i haven't quite gotten myself there yet. Hell, my mum has more tats than me. Just go ther sleeve done a year or two ago and is working on her next one soon! It's just something about that particular style that's comfortable to me, but my neurodivergence (AuADHD) makes permanent alterations to my body freak me out a bit, hence the need for courage. It's more of a mental block than anything,

Also it is 100% me who always goes off topic so fear not! you fit right in if you slip once of twice too!

Half of my closest decade(s) long friendships are with guys so I absolutely agree with you. I never dated any of them and neither did the other girls in the friend group. We've all known one another (as in all of us in the group knowing everyone in the group) since 9th grade and we're turning 25 this year. So it's absolutely possible. People just like to think it's not.

I was similar. When I think of my childhood and my childhood frienships, all of my girl friends were neighbours, whereas all of my school friends were primarily guys, and for the same and similar reasons you've mentioned. I was primarily raised by my dad and I only have brothers so it makes sense to me why I hung out with guys more. And I had a similar experience where girls were just mean to me for no reason and I couldnt at the time figure it out. I know why now that I'm older. But still, that hurts when you're young so you're more likely to go and be with those who feel safer to be with.

I knew i felt a certain type of similarity between out experiences and the shared diagnosis' makes so much sense. Folks treat me very different once I mention that ASD is the reason I dont undertsand things they way they tell me too or whatever the situation is. It's actually why I left my last job. They wouldn't accomodate me and my performance suffered to much as did my mental health.

"many female friends were jealous of me for whatever reasons they had. I'm not being conceited. They were actually jealous of me for any reasons I don't know." My mum saw this when i was younger too. She said i was (and am) "intimidating" and so people would try their best to knock me down a peg. hence the jealousy when their couldnt or when the realised that they wanted what i had. I've accepted it now, and silently acknowledge it. But once again, it still hurt the little girl who couldn't figure out why she was treated so differently.

'The girls I knew end up abusive towards me. Physically, mentally and emotionally. And the few friends, including female friends, worth having in my life were the people who abandoned me. So I've gotten used to being alone now." I'm truly sorry you had to/ have to deal with this. Not in a pitying way, but in a 'human to human I see and acknowledge the things you've gone through in your life' way. I hope you are able to one day build and find for yourself a lovely group of humans who love and respect you for you. Who don't tear you down like the horrible people before them, and instead lift you up. I will happily be a part of that, should you like to have me, just so you know. I may be words on a screen, but there is a person behind them who sees you.

The girlfriend situation of guy friends is something I have very fortunately not had to deal with as I usually end up being their friend too. I have a habit of wanting everyone to feel accepted and included in spaces I exist in, and it commonly plays to my favour. But I have had and heard second hand experiences with this, and it's just awful. And we can reiterate to earlier where guys and girls can be friends without anything going on. I have never understood girls who cut their guys off from perfectly normal and healthy female frienships.

Pushing folks away before they push you is absolutely a coping mechanism I understand. Breaking through that was one of the more difficult things I've been trying to learn as an adult. That some rare folks actually want to be there for me, and truly have no ill intentions. I hope you are able to one day have this as well, to which, once again, I will happily be one, should you want.

Perfectly respectable opinion on the boys and relationships. I have nothing to add other than I agreee completey.

And yes XD I am usually able to tell it's you by the length!! I just know some folks like having a tag to make searching for thir asks easier! I know I did before i had tumblr. It just made tracking what I'd sent in way easier! No rush tho!

Hope you are well, darling <3. Always lovely chatting with you.

#im sorry this took so long but i finally had the proper mental energy and BOOM here she is #asks #anon #ms.mailbox📬

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jeanmoreaux · 1 year ago

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Hi, I'm in dire need of advice (if you feel like providing it). How does one get over a crush? I have the biggest crush on a friend and I'm ace so this never happens to me, but somehow I am just mesmerised by her. And I thought I finally got over it during the summer when we didn't see each other at uni all the time, but now she has invited me to join her in a christmas play inspired by the grimm fairy tales (we study german) and said that I'd be a perfect princess, a beautiful belle from beauty and the beast and now I can't wait stop thinking about her again

god, i wish i had some solid advice like 'oh this thing x helps for sure' but from one person who rarely gets curshes to another: moving on is hard and sucks big time. and there is no 'one method fits all'. from what i read between the lines, the crush being reciprocated doesn't seem a possibility? (because if it did there wouldn't be a reason to move on just now? or at least not until you tried to figure out if she is interested or not... 👀). so. i found that, for me, putting distance between me and my crush doesn't really work (unless the distance stretches for years. then it's different. but with people you see regularly it never worked for me). the moment the person reenters my life, echos of the feelings are reignited until they return in full force. it's very, very annoying. it's almost that, when i don't see someone for a while, the feelings Do get less but i also Don't Deal with them in a way that helps me to move on. in a weird way, exposure therapy is the way for me to deal with feelings for people, especially when i want to keep in my life. and i don't mean hangout with them one-on-one and make yourself miserable, but don't Don't hang out with them. personally, i hung out with these crushes in groups. depending on your crush and the hang out setting it can work like a cold shower in many different ways. and just being around them without there even being the possibility of things happening always gave me moments to kind of reorganise my feelings about them over time. it's not as much that the feelings went away completely, more that they transformed into something less romantic and more platonic. it usually takes some time tho. and just like so many things it's uncomfortable and painful and awkward at times. and to end up having a platonic crush or just platonic feelings in general for someone is different.

so, i'd probably take the opportunity to do the play because it sound like a great opportunity to meet new people and maybe even make some new friends! live your life, do your thing, hang out with friends, have fun.... the feelings will pass eventually. as contrived as it sounds it is true. at least they'll change. and that's something.

i think with feelings of any kind it's often just sitting with them and in them and waiting them out. as a little aside, i always look for refuge in literature and poetry when i am in the thick of it. it's a great way to remind yourself that you're not the first and by far not the last person to experience these feelings. there is solace in that, at least for me. if you have someone in your life you trust with this, it's also always great to share these unrequited crushes with friends/family. everyone has had them, and sharing stories and feelings about them can help as well in the same way literature can help. sometimes just having someone give you a hug and tell you that yeah it sucks can make you feel better.

i know this advice is not very action based, but i haven't found something that helps in a more immediate way. i hope that whatever happens you'll be able to come out more you on the other side of the experience <3

#sending you lots of love and a big hug.#in my mind we were having this conversation over a cup of tea and some biscuits #anon #answer #have a lovely weekend <3 #crush anon

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faithdeans · 1 year ago

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hi, it's ace anon <3

i'm just kind of weird feeling right now because like, i like the idea of romance, i think it's cute, i just don't think it's for me, or if it is, it's gotta be somebody i havent met yet. so that would make me aro or demiromantic, which is cool, and i'm fine with that, i just,

i'm visiting my cousin and his girlfriend of three years and she's so nice and they're so sweet together and i think they're going to get engaged soon based on how my cousin is acting, and it kinda makes me sad to think that i've never met anybody who would ever make me feel like the way they feel with each other. i feel so on the outside and i'm so happy for them, i am, and i'm so excited she's going to be part of our family.

it's just that the way their relationship works and how happy they make each other would never work for me. i realize i'm a different person than them with different boundaries, but looking at them so in love reminds me of how uncomfortable i would be if someone did that to me and also of how awesome love can be, so it's just a sucky feeling.

sorry if this bummed you out, i love you and you really helped me last time, so i'm like praying you have advice for how to not feel sad?

-ace anon

hiiii aceanon!

100% understand how you're feeling rn. when i realised i was aro, i definitely went through a kind of grieving process over it. very much thinking 1) there is something wrong with me and 2) i'm never gonna have that. i don't even think i want that but i'm never gonna have that.

it's like a whole world you can see and have to come to terms with missing out on and it's hard and it's painful. (at least it was for me)

i was actually talking about this yesterday and it's like, i feel like a hopeless romantic still. like i still crave that closeness and honestly some relationshipy things but. it's not romantic for me. it's more like a bond or a trust or just an understanding.

the thing i found the most helpful was romanticising the fuck out of my friendships. idk if you've seen the way i talk to the people i'm closest with on here but it helps so much. we're stargazing together. we're napping together. we're writing each other love letters and poems and getting fake married. it's beautiful and it's so joyful.

i try to bask in the love i can feel rather than mourn the love that i can't.

and you know i still get blushy and butterflies sometimes, when people are particularly sweet or kind. sometimes it feels like little platonic crushes! (and i know that's "all" they are, bc if someone actually told me they felt romatically towards me i'd be pretty uncomfortable yknow?)

also like, if you want a qpr or a partner in the future just maybe take some time and think about how you'd like that to look for you! i can promise you, you will find other people like that, especially with the internet.

honestly realising i'm aro has opened me up so much more to love because i'm not watering down my affections for my friends in fear that it might look romantic. they know i'm aroace, they know i'm just being sillysweet and i know it's the same from them.

idk man, just remember romatic love isn't the only love that can make you feel whole. in the meantime i'm here for you!! i hope you're okay and i love you so very much <3

#ace anon

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thegreyscalerainbow · 2 years ago

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Slash Ships Get to Know Me

Thank you for tagging me @animeangelriku

Rules: Name at least five (but no upper limit) slash (M/M) ships you love. Each from a different fandom.

1. Puzzleshipping (YuGiOh!)- To anyone outside the fandom, it may not make sense, and when I was originally in the Yugioh fandom circa 2006 it didn't make sense to me either. It confused the hell out of me because I was a baby ace ignorant of anything other than what media spoonfed me. But I did value their relationship deeply and knew they did love each other to come capacity. It wasn't until I finally got to watch the subtitled version as an adult that it clicked. It's so very special to me because even though I had preferred the platonic version of it as a kid, it's still incredibly nostalgic for me and it came back into my life at a time when I needed it

1. Ozbert (Pandora Hearts) - Controversial, I know, (It used to be the most popular ship in the fandom) and I have not engaged with this ship in some years since it got in the line of sight for a lot of antis. I actually left a Pandora Hearts discord server over the harassment I saw. But again, I am asexual and aromatic, and this relationship was the first slash ship I got heavily into when I was a teenager. It's got tons of nuance and angst, and as someone who has read a lot of period fiction and is very aware of what was socially acceptable at the time, I view this completely differently from a modern-day setting. My enjoyment of this ship has morphed and is actually not romantic now, but it's on this list for leaving an impact on me. For those who balk at the idea that Oz is 15 and Gilbert is 24 for the main story arc, keep in mind that due to plot reasons, this is a very specific scenario, with supernatural elements and actual time travel involved. In the beginning, Gil is 14 and Oz is 15. So this is someone who had a childhood crush, clung to that love for ten years, but now his crush is back and hasn't aged a day. For me, it's exploring the complexity of that, and it's tragic. Gilbert is such a wonderful character, and any way you look at his feelings, you just know that even if it's not romantic, he and Oz are family.

3. VaNoe (The Case Study of Vanitas) - Same author as Pandora Hearts, and I just know she is going to hurt me again. And I will thank her. We have a reversal of the usual dynamic seen with vampire series. This time, it's the sweet naiive cinnamon roll Vampire, and edgy dark Human with a mysterious past and a broken moral compass. They are foils for each other and have so much chemistry it just works so well! At first, Noe does not like Vanitas at all and wants nothing to do with him, this draws Vanitas to him because he enjoys bothering people who catch his fancy and hate him. Then while his affections are on another, Noe learns more about him and he becomes very attached to Vanitas. Realizing now he has actually made emotional connections, it's clear that Vanitas is now afraid and is pushing them away. There's a push and pull here, and I'm both apprehensive and excited to see where their journey takes them. Even though we know it's going to end badly, based on the first chapter. I'm here for how much Noe has learned about his strange partner, to the point of figuring out a way to speak Vanitas' love language. Also, they both have no flipping clue what Love is, and the entire scene that unfolds during is gold. Vanitas is the kind of character who has never been treated gently by anyone, so I enjoy seeing depictions of him getting that from Noe, because it catches him completely off guard.

4. SidLink (Legend of Zelda) - This one is casual, because I actually have not played Breath of the Wild (I fully intend to though!!) but fandom content of this ship sucked me in. I found one fanfiction that was so incredibly sweet, and fell down a rabbit hole with that writer’s works and have fond memories of reading it. I will definitely have the ship goggles on once I play, I adore Sidon as a character, and I don’t know, giant peppy shark man and tiny human...what is there not to love?

5. SoRiku (Kingdom Hearts) - Another more recent ship, as I was not in the Kingdom Hearts fandom in its heyday. I did not have access to the games, but saw plenty of fandom content of it and honestly, it was always a place of nostalgia even before I watched the Let’s Plays that were online. I’m so glad I did, and many others who adore this ship have laid out all the reasons why better than I could. I just haven’t explored it for myself outside of canon as much as I would like to, but I love it for the same reasons I love the other ships on this list. I guess that says a lot about me because all of these ships but ONE are riddled with Angst. What can I say...I like my Hurt/Comfort fics. I also enjoy seeing them in AUs where they get to live in better timelines. It’s a sort of Catharsis. Now, since the games are still going, where their relationship ends up in canon remains to be seen. I hope it ends well!

And because I like to go ne step further:

6. Natsume x Tanuma (Natsume Yuujin Chou) - It’s so stinking sweet and I’m so soft for it! This series is actually my favorite, and I have revisited so many times for the atmosphere and combination of supernatural horror and slice of life. Natsume lives between worlds, he did not make connections with people because he faced ridicule and was unwanted (he scared people) and he hated Yokai because they interfered with his daily life to the point he did not fit in with humans. He could not share what he saw and suffered. As the series goes on he is able to make connections with both human and Yokai and one of the first people he opened up to about seeing them was Tanuma. Tanuma has some level of spiritual power that allows him to see phantom shadows, so his awareness of Yokai is such that he immediately accepts Natsume and wants to help him. He’s pushing through that wall Natsume has spent most of his life building. Even though he can’t see them and may put himself in danger, he wants to be there for his friend. They share secret knowing glances and smiles, and gradually Natsume is more and more accepting of his help, and opening up to him. Such as being able to admit he can’t see the fireworks at the festival because a giant yokai is in the way, and Tanuma smiles and offers to find a new viewing spot. This series is in a Shojo magazine and the manga-ka chose to make her protagonist male so that she wouldn’t be forced to write a romance. As a result, the girls he interacts with are friendly, but definitely don’t have a lot of romantic potential. Natsume is still way closer to Tanuma than anyone else, even with Taki hanging around. I feel like he and Taki have a friendship, but it ends there as she had never suffered the hardship the boys have. She’s just more likely to team up with Tanuma as a Protection Squad to intervene in the dangers Natsume faces.

#Grey rambles #ships

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ticklishraspberries · 2 years ago

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Don’t You? (Eddie/Steve)

Summary: Steve is more observant than people give him credit for, and Eddie isn’t hiding his need for affection very well. (Based on a lovely prompt from my lovely friend @nhasablogg who suggested some Steddie with the quote “You like this, don’t you?” and I had to pop off and write a full fic instead of a drabble. Anyway, I hope you enjoy! it)

Steve Harrington had never claimed to be smart. He scraped through high school by copying from other students and charming his teachers, and he often felt like common sense managed to escape him. However, contrary to what some may have thought, he wasn't oblivious either. When it came to emotions, he was incredibly intuitive and found himself picking up on the smallest quirks in other people.

Steve could tell when Robin was putting up a front for people she wasn't so close to, forcing her body to be still and her mouth to stay shut. He could sense the relief in her when they were left alone and she could drop the mask and continue her ramblings in peace.

He knew that if Dustin didn't forcibly control the radio in the car, he was distracted by his own thoughts and didn't want to sing along. Nancy quit biting her nails years ago, but when she was especially anxious, she fell back into the habit. Max hummed Kate Bush beneath her breath when she needed to feel safe.

Lately, he had started to notice these things about Eddie. The jokes he cracked to diffuse tension, the way he fiddled with his rings as a distraction. As he spent his time learning Eddie Munson, there was one particular thing that he couldn't get off his mind.

Eddie seemed to lean desperately into every touch, like a drowning man grasping for the shore. It would have been adorable if it wasn’t also sort of sad. While Wayne seemed like a great man, he didn’t strike Steve as the overly affectionate type, and based on what he knew about the rest of Eddie’s family, he figured that hugs were not a very common occurrence.

He had grown up similarly, grasping for affection in the form of friends or girlfriends, trying not to seem as desperate as he felt. So, having been in the same place, Steve would never deny Eddie a bit of platonic affection. The only issue was, his feelings towards Eddie were straying closer to crushing territory, and he didn’t quite feel ready to unpack that.

So, Steve compromised. He gave hugs, shoulder pats, and playful shoves, but was careful to not linger too long, knowing it would only send blood rushing to his cheeks (and possibly elsewhere, if he wasn’t careful). But it broke his heart to see the disappointment in Eddie’s eyes when the touch retracted.

Dignity and pining aside, Steve figured it couldn’t hurt to dial it up a notch.

And that was how he wound up on the floor of Eddie Munson’s trailer, grinning like mad as the guy that most of Hawkins feared laid beneath him, giggling like mad. A quick jab to the side had sent Eddie jerking away as if electrocuted, and Steve wasted no time in pouncing.

The two of them went sprawling to the floor, a mess of flying limbs and giggling, for once, acting like the age they truly were.

Eddie wasn’t weak by any sense of the word, but he was less athletic and still giggling like mad, making it easy for Steve to pin him to the floor and tickle his sides with vigor. The giggles quickly turned to real laughter, loud and uncontrollable.

As Steve switched between squeezing his sides and poking at his belly, he picked up on something else. Eddie didn’t seem to be fighting back. Like, at all.

Normally, when Steve tickled anyone, he was met with playful resistance, begging, and the occasional injury. Robin babbled out pleas for mercy, Dustin kicked as though his life depended on it, and Nancy had once bruised his jaw with a flying elbow. But Eddie just…took it. He squirmed, sure, but that was just a natural reaction. No words of protest had left his lips, only laughter. And his smile was not a forced grin, but rather a genuine beam of childlike joy.

“You like this, don’t you?” Steve asked, stopping his tickling and instead leaning his face close to Eddie’s ear.

Eddie’s cheeks turned red. “What?” he asked, his voice breathless and pitched much higher than usual. “Of course I don’t.” If he were aiming for nonchalance, he was failing miserably. Steve could practically feel the nervous energy radiating from the man beneath him.

Steve hummed. “I don’t believe you,” he replied. “You’re barely fighting back. I mean, you haven’t asked me to stop once, and you could fight back, but you’re just grabbing at your hair instead of trying to push my hands away.”

Eddie’s face was an odd shade of crimson that Steve couldn’t imagine was normal for the average person. He seemed at a loss for words, which was rare for someone who talked so goddamn much. Not that Steve minded, though. It was cute, all his rambling. God, he was really becoming a fool for Eddie, wasn’t he?

“Hey, I’m not making fun of you,” Steve said, sensing that Eddie’s embarrassment was straying into actually upset territory and desperately trying to wrangle it back to cute, playful teasing. “I mean, it’s fine if you do.”

Eddie huffed out a laugh, basically a scoff, but he had stopped denying it.

Then, Steve decided to tell him something that he’d never told anyone before. “I don’t mind it either, you know. Like, it’s sort of fun depending on who does it. Ever since Robin found out I’m ticklish, I haven’t known peace, and like, I could tell her to stop if I wanted and she would. But it’s fun for both of us, so I don’t. So, basically, if I’ve misread and you aren’t having fun, I’ll stop right now and never do it again. But if you’re having fun, I won’t tease you about it anymore.”

Those already big brown eyes somehow widened further as Eddie squirmed. Steve had a hunch that talking about feelings and secrets wasn’t something that he was used to, so he didn’t pry, he just let him figure out what to say next.

“You don’t have to stop,” he said after a moment.

Steve grinned, and resumed his attack on Eddie’s belly, making him bark out a surprised laugh. Once again, his intuition hadn’t failed him, and he was feeling indescribably giddy.

He didn’t expect Eddie to try and fight back after that flustering talk, and so he was taken entirely off guard when Eddie suddenly managed to sit up and push Steve back against the floor, clambering on top of his thighs and grinning like a maniac.

“Since you gave that sincere, adorable little speech, I figured I had to return the favor,” Eddie said, shooting him a wink before latching onto Steve’s sides and letting his fingers dance across his thin t-shirt with the precision only a guitarist could have.

And if Steve wasn’t laughing so hard, eyes squeezed shut and mouth falling into a helpless grin, maybe his intuition would have told him that the way Eddie looked at him, soft eyes and fond smile, maybe he would realize that Eddie totally had a crush on him too, and maybe he would make the first move and kiss him, right then a there, on the floor of his trailer.

There had been enough confessions for the evening, though, and the tickle fight left them both breathless and delighted, and Steve found himself smiling the whole drive home.

#steddie fic #steddie ticklefic #steddie tickle fic #stranger things fic #stranger things tickle fic #stranger things ticklefic #stranger things tickling #eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie x steve #steve x eddie #ticklefic #tickle fic #stranger things #steddie #steveddie #fic #raspberry writes

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deathmetalangel · 2 years ago

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Good day/night! What about... Marceline's (from adventure time) platonic relationship with Princess Bubblegum's little sister aka the reader?

(The reader is an early teenager, who's age is between 11 and 14 years old)

SISTER, SISTER (MARCELINE X FEM! READER/PLATONIC)

warnings: none just cute warning

y/n absolutely adores marceline and wants to be just as cool as she is

Y/n hears the familiar laugh of a vampire and runs quickly to her sisters side. Her small hands grab onto Bubblegum’s gown as she hides behind the fabric of the dress. She looks at Marceline who had yet to notice her presence.

“Y/n did you say hi to Marcy?” Bubblegum says catching the Marceline’s attention.

Y/n waves and awkwardly mumbles, “Good evening Marceline.” Bubblegum smiles at her sister and pats her head. Y/n absolutely adored her big sister and her girlfriend. Marcy was just so cool! And y/n was just a little dweeb.

“Hey short stack. You been giving Pb a hard time?” Marceline smiles at the younger girl who shakes her head no. She’s practically beaming at the smile Marcy gives her. Y/n strived for the approval of both older girls.

“I was wondering if you could show me how to play bass?” Y/n mumbles while playing with the hem of her dress. Bubblegum tilted her head slightly, she had no idea her sister had any inclination to play base. Especially having Marceline teach her.

Marceline thinks for a moment before smiling at the girl. “Of course! I’d be honored to teach a princess, but that’s if it’s okay with Bubblegum.” They both turn towards her expectantly.

“I suppose it would be good for your studies y/n. Music is a very good thing to learn, I dabble in music here and there.” Y/n lights up at her sisters answer. She would get to hang out with Marcy and learn bass. That’s so cool.

“Yay! Thank you so much Bubblegum! I’m gonna be so cool just like Marcy!” Marceline picks up the young princess and starts to float around, not high enough for it to be dangerous though.

“Yeah you’re gonna be cool. Just like me. And who’s cooler than me?” Pb watches the two of them with content. She was glad they were getting along so well. Bubblegum did everything for her sister. She was the last of the family she created which meant she held her close in fears of losing her too.

Even though Bubblegum would never say it out loud, she was a bit jealous though at how much her younger sister looked up to Marceline. Was she not cool enough for her? It hurt her feelings just a bit. Not enough for her to outwardly say something, but enough for it to sting when she wanted to hang out with the vampire and not her.

Perhaps it was just a children thing. Finn too found Marceline cool and exciting even though he enjoyed spending time with Bubblegum because of the boyish crush he harbored for her. Bubblegum true to her nature would remain silent. It’s not like y/n could grow out of that anyways. She was to remain a child forever. Much like she would never age past this point.

“Ya know what how about the three of us go to get some grub. I’m starving. Fries sound kind of good right now.” Marceline floats over to her girlfriend with a giggling y/n still in her arms.

“Fries are my favorite!” She shouts happily wanting to be just like the older girl she admired. Bubblegum smiles happily.

“That sounds like a good idea Marcy. Y/n hasn’t eaten all day.”

It was true, she was so nervous when she heard Marceline was coming over she spent the whole day trying to find a cool outfit to wear. “Can I get a cool bass like yours Marcy?”

The vampire chuckles and puts the younger girl down. “Of course short stack. We can start a band and everything. Marceline the Vampire Queen and y/n the Gumdrop Princess.” Y/n was beaming with excitement.

“Come on let’s go! What are you slow pokes waiting for?” Y/n rushes the two older girls and pulls them along. Everything just felt perfect. Bubblegum giggles at her sisters excitement and smiles at Marceline. She mouths a silent ‘thank you’ making the vampire heat up in the face.

“Yeah Pb it’s no prob.”

#marceline #marceline x bubblegum #marceline x reader #adventure time #adventure time imagine #adventure time x reader #bubbline #princess bubblegum #marceline the vampire queen #fluff #deathmetalangel

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shit-taster-connoisseur · 2 years ago

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hi I saw you were taking asks about mark and rebecca so I thought I'd send one over because I absolutely adore your takes on them!! I'd love to know how you perceive their relationships with the other characters - friends, enemies, partners, crushes, etc :)

DHIXBDD HOWDY AND THANK YOU!! My takes on them are all over the place tbh

Before I actually start- I don't think too deep into their relationships so uhhhh please don't expect a 10 page analysis on them. Hopefully read more works on mobile if not uhhhhhhhh sorry in advance

Gonna start with the obvious Kyle:::

Personally I love the guy but Mark? Not so much. He's always had this personally bias against him for some reason, despite yknow beating his ass in 3rd grade(I think) Like Mark thinks he's suppose to keep this hate against him for what Kyle did to his sister, but in high school obviously that shit in him died but outta pride(or something similar) Mark countinues to subconsciously hate him and just dreads interacting with him.

Kyle and Rebecca's relationship or lack of- gotta be honest Rebecca just avoids cuz the whole dance biz, and she still cringes at the memory and thinks Kyle hates her. He doesn't, but won't stop her thinking so- but in an au, I love tbe thought of Platonic Kybecca, this is the part I cant go into too deep cause I unfortunately haven't thought abt the dynamic alot, but I have an au based around these two hopefully I can actually get rhe stage of making it

Nowwww onto friends

My main friend group for these two are David, Gary, and Cotswolds siblings//I'm not sure how i conjured that combination into existence but hey! I have been running with it for a long time.

How exactly they became friends? I'm not sure either. My brain also tricked me into thinking Gary was homeschooled before he comes to South Park- So he found that common ground with the Mark and Rebecca and ran with it, after he sitting himself at their lunch table in the corner.

Then David kinda wanted a break from the main 4's table so he just joined them at some point. The cotswolds found him and Gary alot more sane than most South Park residents and alot more nicer...Rebecca was won over by them but did take awhile to communicate that, sooo Gary&David were a little hesitant to hang out with her 1-on-1 cause they thought she was still nervous abt them

Mark hates South Park, he's leaving once he has a job and a scholarship outta the country. Yeahhhhh he wasn't too welcoming to David and Gary at first, but he gave pretty mixed signals, ei: inviting them them to places, going to their houses, showing up at David's parent restaurant unprompted, ect...Yknow normal friend things, but he saw it as "testing" them, cuz obviously if the kids are all well and good, it has to the parents that aint! Right?!?

Yeah, Mark was pretty confused when he found out the Rodriguez and Harrison's were all pretty non dysfunctional people and were good parents//good people. Watching their family dynamics made him think alot on how his and Rebecca's parent's relationship isn't all that great.

Lead to alot of rebellious stunt, not extreme but he started taking his parents views with less of a grain of salt, and with that realized slowly his parents are assholes- Rebecca also realized this, but is kinda use to shutting up and keeping her head down she never says anything against it.

Moving on!! David and Gary are pretty understanding of this, and there friendship and homes turned into solace for the siblings^^ Wish i could ramble more abt them but I'm very bad at writing down my thoughts💀

___

Mark's enemies: Leslie, Terrance, Estella, and some more people but these three came off the top my head.

Leslie seems like the type to correct Mark's grammar while speaking, Every. Time.

Mark: "Look you failure of an ai, your-"

Leslie: "*You're."

Mark: "....What"

She gets on his nerves without even trying. And lemme tell you, Mark hates getting corrected so he'd end up going off on her for hours while she just sits there. Then she spends the next hour correcting Mark again. Its pretty one-sided now that I think of it. Mark just seeks her out to best her and she just plays along cause she's bored.

Now onto Terrance. There can only be one smart ass know-it-all, and its Mark! He's had a few school projects that Terrance did by himself so he didn't have to deal with a partner. Well Mark was pretty pissed abt that, when Mark confronted him the next time they had project together they competed to finish it the day of- Yeah they lost alot of beauty sleep that night. So there dynamic is like a academic rivalry.

Now for Estella. Shes a bitch. So is Mark. He was alright with her when she was just a rich capitalist scrum from a distance. Instead she just had to start hanging around Rebecca, and being an overprotective brother he was he started antagonizing her whenever alone, vice versa. They constantly butt heads especially when it comes to Rebecca–Normally Mark wouldn't care who his sister befriends or hangs out with, but Estella is all around a prick and a spoiled brat, so who knows what she'd do to his sister if Estella doesn't get what she wants?

Rebecca's enemies: tbh idk if she has anything against anyone. Probably Terrance? Terrance because y'know his rivalry with her brother, but they barely interact for the most part.

___

Finally getting to my fav part of this ask, crushes/partners, because it gives me any excuse to talk abt Rebstella!!

How they met was Mark's fault, he was an acquaintance of Gregory's(Who hc as Estellas twin!!) At some point their groups collided and Estella thought she was cute and was slightly intrigued by her, Rebecca was kinda awkward the first time they met so she had really no opinion on Estella that day. Estella had no plans to do anything with that thought, unfortunately she let that comment slip and got tired of the Foregien kid's teasing and decided to try befriend her.

They did take awhile to offically to do so given each of their reservations, and during that time Estella slowly realized she might have a crush on her favorite brunette. The feelings were mutual, but Rebecca was very against it, she already had so much going on in her head, having a crush on her one of her bestfriends didn't help. Neither wanted to ruin the friendship so they both attempted bury it down deep with their sub consciousness.

Attempted. Yeah that didn't last that long. They grew even more smitten with each other. and Rebecca got tired of tiptoeing around it and with some encouragement from Gary, David, and Mark–despite his strong bias against Estella. Anyways she asked Estella out over text, yeah Estella took a day to reply to recover, and pratically gave Rebecca heart attack.

Their first date was at fancy restaurant that Estella reserved, all goofy smiles and pre marital hand holding. Dbkdnsidbwis Rebecca was the first to say "I love you" later on, fun fact.

I wanna say more abt them but i don't wanna take too long so I'll be moving onto Mark.

Yeah I personally don't ship him with anyone, Maybe Gary and/or David? But he dies alone no matter what/j

___

Anyways I have nothing to say but heres a doodle of the mentioned Rebecca&Kyle au

#six's thingies #six's art #south park #rebecca cotswolds #mark cotswolds #rebstella #kyle brovlofski #ill probably cringe the way described things here #in the future hopefully

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